Most Quotable Films

[Nak Nak]

Full Metal Jacket:

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: How tall are you, private?
Private Cowboy: Sir, five-foot-nine, sir.
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Five-foot-nine, I didn't know they stacked shit that high.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bullshit. It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: What is your major malfunction, numbnuts? Didn't Mommy and Daddy show you enough attention when you were a child?

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Pyle, you climb obstacles like old people fuck.

[Static Split Screen]

Please, the film you most quote is Napoleon Dynamite. I don't think you even realize how much you quote it ;)

[i]

lol. we quote that at each other all the time. tho it's mostly just "gosh! you IIdiot!"

[Nak Nak]

jeez you guys full metal jacket is probably the most quotable film that I know of.

[Static Split Screen]

-long-suffering sigh-

[Squirrel]

Pffffft. Big Lebowski, c'mon. I'm holding a beverage here!

[Squirrel]

He treats objects like women, man.

[Squirrel]

Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon. With nail polish.

[Squirrel]

Are these the nazis, Walter?

No, Donny. These men are nihilists. There's nothing to be aftraid of.

[Squirrel]

etc.

[motorcyclemptiness]

Cos it isn't at all an obvious choice for me, "Annie Hall":

Alvy Singer: My grammy never gave gifts. She was too busy getting raped by Cossacks.

Duane: Can I confess something? I tell you this as an artist,I think you'll understand. Sometimes when I'm driving... on the road at night... I see two headlights coming toward me. Fast. I have this sudden impulse to turn the wheel quickly, head-on into the oncoming car. I can anticipate the explosion. The sound of shattering glass. The... flames rising out of the flowing gasoline.
Alvy Singer: Right. Well, I have to - I have to go now, Duane, because I, I'm due back on the planet Earth.

Alvy Singer: I think, I think there's too much burden placed on the orgasm, you know, to make up for empty areas in life.
Pam: Who said that?
Alvy Singer: It may have been Leopold and Loeb.

[Ash]

Originally posted by Squirrel
Pffffft. Big Lebowski, c'mon. I'm holding a beverage here!

I just realised I say that quote quite a bit.

Another good one : "That rug really tied the room together."

And : "The bums lost Lebowski! I suggest you do what your parents did - GET A JOB!"

[june angels]

Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Breakfast Club
Office Space
Better Off Dead... -the movie Napoleon Dynamite wishes is was.:rolleyes:
A League Of Their Own ("There's no crying in baseball!")
Mean Girls-most quotable movie with my beloved Rachel McCutie :love:
High Fidelity
Coming To America-Eddie Murphy's best/funniest movie of his "Paramout Pictures era" IMO.
Fletch-the last funny non-Vacation movie with Chevy Chase
American Beauty

[Static Split Screen]

I don't think I really quote movies very often. I never notice if I do, anyway.

[Jackal]

Full Metal Jacket
Star Wars
Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Sixteen Candles
Forrest Gump

[jas1n]

Originally posted by june angels

Mean Girls

do you wanna do something fun? do you wanna go to Taco Bell?

[Static Split Screen]

I gotta see that movie again, it's brilliant.

[vaya con dios]

Originally posted by Nak Nak
Full Metal Jacket:

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: How tall are you, private?
Private Cowboy: Sir, five-foot-nine, sir.
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Five-foot-nine, I didn't know they stacked shit that high.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bullshit. It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: What is your major malfunction, numbnuts? Didn't Mommy and Daddy show you enough attention when you were a child?

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Pyle, you climb obstacles like old people fuck.

My favorite bit actually is a whole of the latter part of these quotes... "I bet if there was some pussy up on that perch, your ass would be up there...if there was a God, Pyle, he'd miracle your ass up there, wouldn't he?! Your ass looks like 90 pounds of chewed bubble gum, do you know that Pyle?!"

Etc etc
etc

[motorcyclemptiness]

Bill and Ted stuff.

Bill: Yeah. This is Dave Beeth Oven.
Bill: And, uh, Maxine of Arc, Missy. Herman the Kid.
Ted: Bob "Genghis" Khan. So-crates Johnson. Dennis Frood. And uh, uh... Abraham Lincoln.

Bill: You ditched Napoleon.
Ted: Deacon, do you realize you have just stranded one of Europe's greatest leaders in San Dimas.
Deacon: He was a dick.

[june angels]

Originally posted by motorcyclemptiness
Bill and Ted stuff.

Bill: Yeah. This is Dave Beeth Oven.
Bill: And, uh, Maxine of Arc, Missy. Herman the Kid.
Ted: Bob "Genghis" Khan. So-crates Johnson. Dennis Frood. And uh, uh... Abraham Lincoln.

Bill: You ditched Napoleon.
Ted: Deacon, do you realize you have just stranded one of Europe's greatest leaders in San Dimas.
Deacon: He was a dick.

teacher: Who was Joan Of Arc?
Ted: Noah's wife?

[Mr. Felix]

Originally posted by Squirrel
Pffffft. Big Lebowski, c'mon. I'm holding a beverage here!

...and Dude, Chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature. Asian-American, please!

[Mr. Felix]

Ghost World:

"Hey, look. There's the pants. "

"Hey, you guys wanna go see some reggae tonight?"

"So what was all that about enlarged holes and tight cracks?"

"Sacrifice virgins and stuff."

"I'm taking a remedial high school art class for fuck-ups and retards. "

"What are we, in slow motion here? C'mon, what are you, hypnotized? Have some more kids, why don't you. "

"You also invented homos."

"I was wearing that dress when I lost my virginity."

Dear Josh, we came by to fuck you, but you were not home. Therefore... you are gay. Signed Tiffany, and Amber. "

By the end of the summer you're going to be up to your neck in pussy. "

"Everyone's too stupid!"

"Jesus!"

[Herr Lipp]

Originally posted by Ash
I just realised I say that quote quite a bit.

Another good one : "That rug really tied the room together."

And : "The bums lost Lebowski! I suggest you do what your parents did - GET A JOB!"

"8 year olds, dude"

"Nihilists! Fuck Me. Say what you like about the tenets of national socialism but at least it was an ethos dude!"

"That's just like, your opinion, man"

Big Lebowski is more quotable than Full Metal Jacket.

[jas1n]

Originally posted by *felix* stars as BraZil!

"You also invented homos."


haha i love that guy.

[Elefterios]

from street fighters:

"Troopers! I have just received new orders. Our superiors say the war is cancelled, and we can all go home. Bison is getting paid off for his crimes, and our friends will have died here... will have died for nothing. But... we can all go home. Meanwhile, ideals like these - freedom, and justice - they get packed up. But... we can all go home. Well... I'm not going home. I'm gonna get on my boat, and I'm going up-river, and I'm going to kick that son-of-a-bitch Bison's ass so HARD... that the next Bison wanna-be is gonna feel it. Now who wants to go home... and who wants to go with ME?!"

Guile tells it like it is. :drool:


http://www.coke-babies.com/writing/streetfighter/animation01.gif

[vordabois]

Originally posted by i
lol. we quote that at each other all the time. tho it's mostly just "gosh! you IIdiot!"

"I wish you'd get out of my life and SHUT UP!"

[vordabois]

~Dr. Strangelove~

Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake
"That Coca-Cola machine. I want you to shoot the lock off it. There may be some change in there."

Col. Bat Guano
"That's private property."

Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake
"Colonel, can you possibly imagine what's going to happen to you, your frame outlook, way of life and everything when they learn that you have obstructed a telephone call to the President of the United States?! Can you imagine?! SHOOT IT OFF! With the gun! That's what the bullets are for, you twit!"

Col. Bat Guano
"OK. I'm gonna get your money for ya. But if you don't get the President of the United States on the phone, you know what's gonna happen to you?"

Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake
"WHAT?!"

Col. Bat Guano
"You're gonna have to answer to the Coca-Cola Company."

Gen. Buck Turgidson
"Mr. President, we cannot allow a mineshaft gap!!"

President Merkin Muffley
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room!"

Gen. Buck Turgidson
"Doctor, you mentioned the ratio of ten women to each man. Now, wouldn't that necessitate the abandonment of the so-called monogamous sexual relationship, I mean, as far as men were concerned?"

Dr. Strangelove
"Regrettably, yes. But it is, you know, a sacrifice required for the future of the human race. I hasten to add that since each man will be required to do prodigious... service along these lines, the women will have to be selected for their sexual characteristics which will have to be of a highly stimulating nature."

Ambassador de Sadesky
"I must confess, you have an astonishingly good idea there, Doctor."

Dr. Strangelove
"Sir! I have a plan!"

[standing up from his wheelchair]

Dr. Strangelove
"Mein Führer! I can walk!"

[Jackal]

Pulp Fiction!

[Mr. Felix]

Eatin' a bitch out and givin' a bitch a foot-massage ain't the same fuckin' thing!

[Barbara]

True Romance

"I eat the pussy, I eat the ass, I eat every-motherfucking-thing."

"Floyd smoked the second page of the letter."

Boondock Saints

"We could kill everyone!"

"I can't get a pack of smokes without running into nine guys you fucked!"

"You'll have to ask your mom, but it's alright with me if your friends sleep over."

Pricess Bride

pretty much any quote from this movie is classic.

"You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia..."

"Fezzick, are there rocks ahead?"
"If they are, we'll all be dead!"
"No more rhymes, now I mean it!"
"Anybody wanna peanut?"

"Give us the gate key."
"I have no gate key."
"Fezzick, tear his arms off."
"Oh, you mean this gate key!"

[Mark E. De Sade]

"Listen man, I smoke, I snort... I've been begging on the street since I was just a baby. I've cleaned windshields at stop lights. I've polished shoes, I've robbed, I've killed... I ain't no kid, no way. I'm a real man."

[El Loto]

Monty Python

"Camelot"
"Camelot"
"Camelot"
"It's only a model"
"sshh!"

"I fart in you general direction
You're mother was a 'amster
and your father smelt of elderberries"

[revgoozen]

Jordan: I never sleep, I don't know why. I had a roomate and I drove her nuts, I mean really nuts, they had to take her away in an ambulance and everything. But she's okay now, but she had to transfer to an easier school, but I don't know if that had anything to do with being my fault. But listen, if you ever need to talk or you need help studying just let me know, 'cause I'm just a couple doors down from you guys and I never sleep, okay?......


Mitch: What is it?
Chris Knight: It's a penis stretcher. Do you want to try it?
Mitch: No.
Chris Knight: I'm just kidding. It's yet another in a long series of diversions in an attempt to avoid responsibility.....

Dr. Dodd: Why is that toy on your head?
Chris Knight: Because if I wear it any place else, it chafes....

Chris Knight: This? This is ice. This is what happens to water when it gets too cold. This? This is Kent. This is what happens to people when they get too sexually frustrated. ...

Mitch: The weirdest thing just happened to me.
Chris Knight: Was it a dream where you were where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid, with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?
Mitch: No...
Chris Knight: Why, am I the only one who has that dream? ....

Chris Knight: So, if there's anything I can do for you, or, more to the point, to you, you just let me know.
Susan: Can you hammer a six-inch spike through a board with your penis?
Chris Knight: Not right now.
Susan: A girl's gotta have her standards....

Kent: You're all a bunch of degenerates.
Chris Knight: Oh, really? Well, what about that time I found you naked with that bowl of Jell-O?
Kent: You did not.
Chris Knight: This is true.
Kent: Yeah, well it was hot and I was hungry....

Major Carnagle: Where's the laser?
Professor Hathaway: It's coming.
Major Carnagle: It's coming? It's not even breathing hard. ...

[vaya con dios]

Anyone ever seen After Hours?

[Puberty]

Originally posted by Static Split Screen
Napoleon Dynamite

*shivers* someone please tell me what was so great and/or quotable about that film. nothing at all stood out to me as witty, funny, interesting, or otherwise worthwhile to ever repeat.
I'm at a total loss at understanding why that film is so popular.

[Joliet's Green Onions]

"this parrot is no more!"



Airplane
Life of Brian
Forest Gump

[vaya con dios]

Originally posted by Puberty
*shivers* someone please tell me what was so great and/or quotable about that film. nothing at all stood out to me as witty, funny, interesting, or otherwise worthwhile to ever repeat.
I'm at a total loss at understanding why that film is so popular.

It's really not in the dialogue, nor the acting or even anything else about it. I think it's the exaggeration, of the lines. That's why I find it comedic. It's why most people like Paul Reubens, I think.

[me_elliott]

Speed Levitch: On really romantic evenings of self, I go salsa dancing with my confusion.

-------------

Celine: I've been thinking also about something you said.

Jesse: What's that?

Celine: Just about reincarnation and where all the new souls come through over time. Everybody says they have been the reincarnation of Cleopatra or Alexander The Great. I always want to tell them they were probably some dumb fuck like everybody else.

[Nak Nak]

*shivers* someone please tell me what was so great and/or quotable about that film. nothing at all stood out to me as witty, funny, interesting, or otherwise worthwhile to ever repeat.
I'm at a total loss at understanding why that film is so popular.


the low class comedy of the film joins a great number of things that fly over your head.

[vaya con dios]

The Cable Guy.

[Kinbote]

The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou


Steve: Son of a bitch, I'm sick of these dolphins.

Klaus: Who the shit is Kingsley Zissou?

Klaus: I always thought of you two as my dads. Please don't let anyone make fun of me for saying so.

Steve: Those fucking amateurs. You left your dog, you idiots!

Steve: Hey - bull dykes can get pregnant.

Oseary: You must swear, legally swear, that you will not kill that shark, or whatever it is, if it actually exists.
Steve: I'm going to fight it, but I'll let it live. What about my dynamite?

[Kinbote]

*shivers* someone please tell me what was so great and/or quotable about that film. nothing at all stood out to me as witty, funny, interesting, or otherwise worthwhile to ever repeat.
I'm at a total loss at understanding why that film is so popular.

I'd have never thought it possible, but I agree with you completely.

[aria]

Pffffft. Big Lebowski, c'mon


i was gonna post that :mad:

I actually called my bf today his dudeness :cry:

oh, and "We are german nihilists. JA!"

[Atomsk Iscariot]

The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
Steve Zissou: Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go on an overnight drunk, and in 10 days I'm going to set out to find the shark that ate my friend and destroy it. Anyone who wants to tag along is more than welcome.

Ned Plimpton: I'm gonna fight you, Steve.
[Steve hits Ned in the face]
Steve Zissou: You never say, "I'm gonna fight you, Steve." You just smile and act natural, and then you sucker-punch him.

Steve Zissou: Don't point that gun at him, he's an unpaid intern.

Steve Zissou: We were pretty good while we lasted, weren't we?
Oseary Drakoulias: Oh, we were like glory's gate, my darling. We were like that bloody shark of yours, we swam with the... oh, damn it, I had it on the plane.

Jane Winslett-Richardson: You're too old for me, Steve.
Steve Zissou: Yeah, well, you're pregnant.

Alistair Hennessey: Is this my espresso machine? Wh-what is-h-how did you get my espresso machine?
Bill Ubell: Well... uh... we fuckin' stole it, man.

[Kinbote]

Be STILL, Cody.

[Nak Nak]

Oho I think someone is sore!

[Kinbote]

One good turn deserves another!

[Nak Nak]

One good turn deserves another!
huuuuh

[vaya con dios]

Be STILL, Cody.

That scene will never get old. I laugh every damn time.

[Herr Lipp]

oh, and "We are german nihilists. JA!"

One of the Nihilists really looks like Flea from RHCP.

[vaya con dios]

One of the Nihilists really looks like Flea from RHCP.

it is Flea.

also, anyone seen Heathers?

[i]

I liked Flea in the Back to the Future series.

[Nak Nak]

I liked Flea in the Back to the Future series.
He's Marty's future boss, right?

[motorcyclemptiness]

Fuck me gently with a chainsaw.

[Kinbote]

I rarely find movies that funny. it's hard to know when to laugh without a laugh track.

I hate this trend of television sitcoms without laugh tracks. I think they're just doing it 'cause know they're not funny and thus have nowhere stick the laughs.

[june angels]

Beverly Hills Cop

Sergeant Taggart: We're more likely to believe him than some foul-mouthed jerk from out of town.
Axel Foley: "Foul-mouthed"? Fuck you!

Axel Foley: Don't you think I realize what's going on here, miss? Who do you think I am, huh? Don't you think I know that if I was some hotshot from out of town that pulled inside here and you guys made a reservation mistake, I'd be the first one to get a room and I'd be upstairs relaxing right now. But I'm not some hotshot from out of town, I'm a small reporter from "Rolling Stone" magazine that's in town to do an exclusive interview with Michael Jackson that's gonna be picked up by every major magazine in the country. I was gonna call the article "Michael Jackson Is Sitting On Top of the World," but now I think I might as well just call it "Michael Jackson Can Sit On Top of the World Just As Long As He Doesn't Sit in the Beverly Palm Hotel 'Cause There's No Niggers Allowed in There!"

Axel Foley: Disturbing the peace? I got thrown out of a window! What's the fuckin' charge for getting pushed out of a moving car, huh? Jaywalking?

Axel Foley: This is the cleanest and nicest police car I've ever been in my life. This thing is nicer than my apartment.

Police Chief Hubbard: What's this man doing here?
Axel Foley: Bleeding, sir.

[vaya con dios]

Loved the bits in Part II about Johnny Wishbone. Oh, and the big-tittied blonde at the beginning.

Fuck. Time to re-rent 48 Hours, now that I think about it. LOL@the bar scene.

[rjoepenk]

HOW has no-one said One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest:

'Give me one week and and I'll have wound up so far she won't know whether to shit or wind her wrist watch!'

McMurphy: 'Where the hell is he why don't he answer?'
Taber: 'He's jerkin' off somewhere!!' (laughter)
Turkle: 'Ain't nobody jerkin' off nowhere motherfucker!!'

Withnail & I:

(Takes place in pub)

Withnail: 'You'll be pleased to hear Monty's invited us for drinks'
Marwood (Yes, he's called Marwood and i knew that, I'm a member of the official fan page!): 'Balls to Monty We're getting out'
Withnail: 'Balls to Monty? I've just spent an hour flattering the bugger!'
Marwood: 'There's one over there doesn't like the perfume. A big one. Don't look, don't look. We're in danger, we've got to get out.'
Withnail: 'What are you talking about?'
Marwood: 'I've been called a ponce.'
(Withnail addresses the whole pub)
Withnail: 'What FUCKER said that?!'
(Huge Irish guy gets up and Withnail's face drops)
Irish: 'I called him a ponce. And now I'm calling you one. Ponce!'
Withnail: 'Would you like a drink?'
Irish (Ripping Withnail's Tartan scarf off): 'What's your name, McFUCK?!'
Withnail (summoning his acting ability to the full): 'I have a heart condition. I have a heart condition. If you hit me it's m-murder!'
Irish: 'I'll murder the pair of y'ers!'
Withnail: (Pathetic whisper) My wife is having a baby! (Hits on a plan of action) Listen, I don't know what my f... (starts to say "friend") acquaintance did to upset you but it's nothing to do with me. I suggest you both go outside and discuss it sensibly, in the street.'
(Moment of silence, before Withnail grabs his scarf and runs screaming from the pub, followed closely by Marwood)

Classic, everyone should see that.

My ultimate favourite movie line ever, however, is from Easy Rider:

'They'll talk to you and talk to you and talk to you about individual freedom. But they see a free individual, it's gonna scare 'em'

I love a bit of plastic prayer :)

(By the way I'm a kick-ass impressionist, and these are much better when I do them)

[vaya con dios]

^ ^ ^ ^

What about the bit in The Last Detail in the bar? That's fucking great!

[rjoepenk]

Yeah! I could watch the other part when they're in the bathroom having that fight all day.

[Herr Lipp]

Blazing Saddles:

"We'll take the niggers and the chinks, but we dont want the Irish!"

[Herr Lipp]

it is Flea.

kewl.