...................(there are no words)

[Hi There, Am Pam]

http://www.bibleman.com/

While searching for information on Billy Graham (see Ted's post on Intelligent Design (http://www.blamonet.com/vb/showthread.php?threadid=72990)), I came across a Bibilical kids ummm... show? movie? I dunno.... called "Bibleman" in which he fights evil villians, such as the wacky Wild Protester, and the shifty Primordius Drool!


Well, I thought it was rather funny, until I watched the trailer (available on the first page and in the store next to all the DVDs). Then it became hilarious. And after seeing the super villian, I couldn't breathe. After seeing Bibleman talk, I nearly choked to death.

Go, see for yourself. I promise good times for all.

[Barbara]

Jesus Christ!

hehe

this is a joke site, right? it's got to be!!! shit, they have a tour of live shows and it all looks pretty legit... they have a tv show on TBN!! They're working on a bibleman video game!!

Fuck, it's not a joke? That DOES make it hilarious! :D

I can't watch the clips though and AUUGH that's probably the funniest part! :cry:

[Hi There, Am Pam]

Oh, it's pretty serious! It's obviously somewhat camp, and ripped off of Power Rangers. However, they describe the latest DVD as "Featuring mind boggling special effects, spectacular battles, hilarious songs and non-stop action,"

Mind boggling special effects? Yeeaahh, it takes quite a bit these days to make that claim, and this might have been passing the grade 10 years ago.


Anyway, the videos are the best part. They capture something the website doesn't. It didn't work under Firefox for me, but you need Flash for it to work in Internet Exploder, so I'm guessing you won't be able to see it at work. :(

[Hi There, Am Pam]

And I didn't notice the video game! I can't wait for that!!!!

[Barbara]

There are Bibleman live tours in Texas (a bunch of them! :O), Colorado, Michigan, California but none in Kansas?! Come on Bibleman, our state is changing its school science standards to help find the evil Primordial Drool, and you won't even tour here? :cry:

[Tabris]

I accidentally came accorss this show one saturday about 5 months ago, thinking it was some sort of typical saturday afternoon action crapolla... until it revealed itself to be a horrible horrible bullshit christian thing! and the guy has a rip off lightsaber

[Leela]

Dear God, please save me from your followers

[Hi There, Am Pam]

Yeah, that lightsabre is a total rip-off. Has anyone ever played those Wisdom Tree games for NES? They pretty much violated copywrite law to publish those, which is rather ironic.

[Hi There, Am Pam]

Of course, Wisdom Tree was a company full of shitty programmers who used Christianity because they knew parents wouldn't actually care about the quality of the game.


"Spiritual Warfare" was pretty cool though.

[Barbara]

I remember Bible Adventures a long time ago on NES! that game sucked! :D but I remember it had this one annoying electronic christmas carol thing for music on one part of it

[vordabois]

Originally posted by Hi There, Am Pam
http://www.bibleman.com/

Oh.

My.

God!!!!

:lol: :lol:

From the Trinity Broadcasting Network... the same one with that lady with the ridiculously poofy hair (it's bigger than her head) and caked eye makeup. And she's always crying, mascara running all down her face about "the children! Oh my Heavenly Father... The children, those poor innocent souls!" You know, it's a talk show where the set is painted almost entirely in gold paint. :-p

[Drunkenmaster]

Originally posted by vordabois
the same one with that lady with the ridiculously poofy hair is it pink? i laugh at her on an almost daily basis.

[Chopstick]

jigga?

http://www.theage.com.au/ffxImage/urlpicture_id_1070732208582_2003/12/09/tammy_baker.jpg

[Drunkenmaster]

http://www.insolitology.com/images/crouches.jpg

[vordabois]

Originally posted by Drunkenmaster
http://www.insolitology.com/images/crouches.jpg

THAT ONE! Yes, that is her!

Jan Crouch! Or, her real name is Jan Bethany (according to wikipedia).

I searched for a picture of her with the mascara running all down her face, but I can't find any. And you know, if you've ever seen her on TV, you'd know how absolutely remarkable that is, because it's like clockwork with her. She's always crying.

I just imagine the producer behind the camera: "OK, Mrs. Jan, your initial two minutes of 'dry time' are up. Turn on the waterworks!" Then she proceeds to cry for the rest of the show, babbling on about children.

(People compare her to Tammy Faye Bakker or whatever her name is, but they're like "It's Tammy Faye times ten! Complete with silicone-inflated lips and multiple pink wigs!")

She even goes to third world countries and, you know, pitches her cry-fits with kids in her arms sometimes.

Dude, if I ever saw her in real life, I'd probably run. She may look passibly normal on TV, but could you imagine what she looks like in person? Yikes.

She IS Mary Kay's Frankenstein.

[Leela]

Originally posted by Chopstick
jigga?



TAMMY FAYE IS MY HERO

[Chopstick]

Originally posted by Sex n' Cigarettes
TAMMY FAYE IS MY HERO
I read a book called Son of a Preacher Man by the Bakkers' son. It was about how his dad's downfall and how the evangelical community really fucked him up, and now he had to learn to forgive them and how Christianity is not about destroying other Christians who fuck up big time. Also Jerry Fallwell is a cunt.

[Static Split Screen]

Originally posted by Sex n' Cigarettes
Dear God, please save me from your followers

[vaya con dios]

On Charles In Charge, Scott Baio's friend (Buddy?) is actually Bibleman... I heard about it years ago.

You could make some fucking coin on those conventions... makes me wanna be a con artist, it does.

[Drunkenmaster]

Originally posted by vordabois

She even goes to third world countries and, you know, pitches her cry-fits with kids in her arms sometimes.
Ugghhh.... Like that fuckin' Sally Struthers. FEED MEE!!!! Oh, I mean the children....feed the children.

[Divine]

my fathers mother is obsessed with TBN and spent $80,000 helping the jews in Israel. Isn't that insane? She was able to go to Washington DC to meet with Pres. Dubya and Ariel Sharone (spelling?) for some Israel thing that was going on a little over 2 years ago. it was all stupid.

[Kelly Kapowski]

Originally posted by vaya con dios
On Charles In Charge, Scott Baio's friend (Buddy?) is actually Bibleman... I heard about it years ago.

Yeah i saw that a long time ago on a 'where are they now' sort of special on VH1. Willy Ames (sp?) is a creep-out molestor creep.

[Drunkenmaster]

Originally posted by Kelly Kapowski
Yeah i saw that a long time ago on a 'where are they now' sort of special on VH1. Willy Ames (sp?) is a creep-out molestor creep. He's also on VH1's Celebrity Fat Club.